The Party Through The Haze of Time

On the way to the Lipstick Lounge on Saturday, Lintilla and I had a conversation about how each of us, for some reason, had always set off people’s gaydar.  We each had stories of being propositioned by members of our own gender, more than one story, actually- many.  It’s another reason I love her; after all these years, we still fit together like a glove.

So, although this is a post about the Beantown party Saturday night, it, as with most of my posts, will always distill itself down to one fact: I really, really love my wife.

I’m very sorry I didn’t get around to speaking to each of you who were there personally (Especially Aunt B).  I am, for the most part, a teetotaler.  One beer, and I’m slurring my words; two, and I start walking funny.  And the absolutely wonderful staff at the Lipstick Lounge kept bringing them.  So, I pretty much kept it simple: my seat, the stage, the men’s room.  It was something I could reasonably manage.

It didn’t help that beer was essentially my dinner.  I had two of Kat’s french fries (which she didn’t eat for some reason), and the end of Lintilla’s wonderful “It Must Be Atkins” salad, and beer.  It came, to my estimation, about 6 or 7 hundred calories (thank you, Mic Ultra).  Lintilla, as usual, was the designated driver; she downed diet coke and sprite like there was no tomorrow all night. I love that woman.

On the way in, I gave Big Orange Michael a little ribbing about Vandy knocking Tennessee out of the SEC tourney.  It had to be done, sorry.  Then, we walk in, and Mack gave me the funniest, double-take look I have ever seen in my life.  If I only had a camera!  I know I look different than last time we met, but I swear, that look was priceless.

We sat and talked cameras for a while with Chris Wage, and I tried to hold my own in the conversation, but – knowing nothing about photography, after one beer it was pretty much hopeless.  (Let me now join everyone else in saying that there is a photo of me that Chris took that I love.  Do you see a pattern here, Chris?)  Since Lintilla was eating, and I was pretty much staying one place, our seat-mates rotated the rest of the evening, which was kind of neat in and of itself.  We sat with Kat for a while and talked kids and education and OCD, which was fun.

Ivy hung with us a while.  She is the kind of person that is most fun at parties; she is bound and determined to have a good time, and that every one around her should have a good time, and I have no doubt that if anyone gave us any crap she could have kicked their butts for us. 😉  It’s kind of funny that most people think I’m this reserved, uptight guy, but deep down, I have an inner Ivy.  Only one other person amongst Nashville bloggers has ever even had a peek at that side of me:

John H and his lovely wife Lynn came in, and I knew it was going to be a party.  They are simply the most friendly,open, coolest couple I know. 

I finally got to meet nm (what a delightful person!), and Shauna (OK, we’ve met before, but only once), who has the second most beautiful little girl in the universe, besides Trillian.  Kate’O and Karsten were there, being their usual cool selves.  Brittney, of course, was there; for a long time she just seemed to be taking it all in.  And several of B’s commenters that I’ve always wanted to meet were there; had I been in a better state, I would have known they were there and could have introduced myself.  Maybe next time.  I was thrilled, also, to finally get to meet Mary Mancini.  We must, must, MUST find time in the future to have a long, sober conversation. You can tell when someone’s just talking to you, and when they are engaging; Mary was the latter – this makes all the difference in the world when talking about politics.  Of course, we didn’t talk about politics, we talked about my weight loss.  But, even tipsy, I can tell about people; Mary is a great conversationalist.

Mrs Jag has the coolest glasses I’ve ever seen.  She is one of my favorite Nashville people. I wish I could have spoken to her more.

And, of course, the stunningly beautiful and talented Ginger, who somehow seemed to be having a really good time even though she was also partially in charge of things.  Did you know she can tie a knot in a cherry stem with her tongue?

I know I’ve forgotten someone.  Sorry – please remember my state at the time; remind me in the comments, and I’ll correct the error.

The Karaoke started, and then the fun really began.  Ginger has an incredible voice.  And believe me, I’m surrounded by women with incredible voices, I know.  As I listened to her wonderful singing, my wheels started spinning.  Ginger, if you’re ever interested in any studio work, let me know.  Ginger actually made Jesus, Take The Wheel interesting again.

Others have said it better than me: Kat had the performance of the night.  It was wonderful to behold.  She, of course, picked a Zevon song, Werewolves of London, and she belted it with all the gusto she had.  Most singers over sing that song; Kat approached it with the right sense of irony. The crowd sang along with the aw-wooos, which was a nice touch.  Lintilla and I, for 20 years, have harmonised on them, and that was a blast to be able to do again.  Did I tell you I love my wife?

I have never seen a better juxtoposition of song and person than when Ivy did Family Tradition.  She was one of the first to sing, and she wanted me to come along for “moral support”, but I conveniently forgot, which is a good thing. It was marvelous as it was. 

When Mary did To The Left (with re-written lyrics) with Brittney and Aunt B, the crowd listened to every word.  At that time, Chris Wage asked me if I was being converted as we speak.  I just shook my head.  Even three beautiful women and buckets of beer aren’t quite enough to get me to make that jump.  But, it was witty and fun, nonetheless.

As an aside, Brittney, Aunt B, and Mack all have better voices that they let on. 

My songs?  I will say this: I’ve been singing from stages for over 25 years, but for the most part, it’s been hair metal pop, country, or some form of Christian music.  I’ve always had a dream of being able to sing Otis Redding’s Try a Little Tenderness from a stage, but I’ve never had the opportunity.  I want to thank everyone there for indulging me a allowing me to finally realise that dream. It was also an added bit of neatness that a batchelorette party was there, and they really seemed to enjoy that song.

I’ve learned something new: beer dries out your throat, making your voice crack at inopportune moments.

I knew my voice was shot after that, but I still wanted to sing another song to let Lintilla know how hot she is to me;  thank God for Santana’s Smooth.  A nice, level vocal.  Unfortunately, the Karaoke version was in A minor, and I’m used to doing it a little higher than that.  Nevertheless, it was big fun.  Sorry about the goofy gyrations, guys; I was trying to seduce my wife. 😉

Singing with the whole group on “Love Shack” was big, big fun. 

We were having so much fun,we stayed a little too long, and almost got home too late for the sitter to get home before curfew.  Before we left, Lintilla did something crazy.  Remember, I told you about the whole “gaydar” thing?  Well, despite this fact, Lintilla was absolutely dying to know if one particular patron there was a woman she remembered from high school.  To do this, she would have to walk up to the woman and ask;  both of us laughed that it could have been misconstrued, in this setting, as a pick-up line.  But, she did it anyway (the woman was, in fact, a good 15 years younger than Lintilla; they both laughed off the situation).

I’ve been making a fool of myself from the stage for many, many years, and Lintilla has put up with it for most of that time.  I’ve made a fool of myself at parties for many years, and Lintilla is always there to be the fun companion and still drive me home.  Do you know what a blessing this is? 

So, even though Ginger has posted a photo where Lintilla is looking at the camera, and I appear to be looking at Ivy’s boobs, you have to know that I am still, after all these years, deeply and madly in love with my wife.

Finally (is he ever going to shut up?), I’ve said this before: I feel like I “know” you people better than I know people I see every day. It’s really neat to run into people that I have only met face-to-face once or twice, and feel like I am amongst dear old friends.  This is what’s so neat about blogging. 


8 Responses to “The Party Through The Haze of Time”

  1. Ginger Says:

    Slarti, you look and sound amazing!!! It was just a total thrill to finally hear you sing. I do understand what you said about beer drying out your throat — lol — that’s the reason why I would finish singing and say, “I sucked!” because my throat felt like sandpaper and I couldn’t hit my high notes. Knowing you are a singer, I know you understood… 🙂 There’s nothing like having folks still tell you they liked what you did, though. Oh, and YES I am interested in studio work! I totally have gotten out of the loop on getting any, so please, yes, please call me.

    About that photo where you think it looks like you’re looking at Ivy’s boobs: well first of all, who didn’t look at Ivy’s boobs that night? LOL…and secondly, it didn’t appear to me that you are looking at them in that pic! 🙂 There is no doubting the love you have for your beautiful bride, even if you had been looking at boobies. ahahahaha

    I’m sure Lintilla won’t mind me saying that you look like a total hottie in all of the pics Chris took of you. I’m in awe of his ability. Unreal.

    I still am on a high from how fun it was the other night. I most definitely want to hang with you guys on a more intimate level so we can share some “deep thoughts” too. Our kids could play again!

  2. newscoma Says:

    Wish I could have joined you. It appears you had a great time.

  3. Shauna Says:

    Have we really met before? Maybe it’s just that I didn’t recognize you — rumor has it that you’ve lost a Great Deal Of Pounds. I feel bad for not remembering, because I always get mad when Big Orange Michael thinks he’s never met me before. Every single time.

    At any rate, it was an absolute treat to watch you perform. Lintilla is a lucky lady to get serenaded like that — I’m just glad the rest of us got to listen in.

  4. badbadivy Says:

    t’s kind of funny that most people think I’m this reserved, uptight guy, but deep down, I have an inner Ivy.

    I can totally see that. You were so awesome when you sang, it was like looking at a totally different person.

    I have never seen a better juxtoposition of song and person than when Ivy did Family Tradition.

    Hopefully that’s a compliment! 😉 Thanks. I had a great time hanging with y’all.

  5. nm Says:

    Slarti, it was good to meet you. It was a treat to see/hear you sing, too.

  6. Lynnster Says:

    Well, from the pics I’ve seen, Ivy’s boobs were one (I mean, two) of the stars of the evening, so… :p

    It looks like you guys had such a fabulous time and I’m sorry I missed it, really sorry.

    And I don’t know if you saw my comment at NIT but mister, you look fantastic w/ the weight loss! I don’t know what you were fretting about a week or two ago about not having lost “enough”. Very dramatic & looks good on you! And remember, it’s only been not yet three months since I last saw you. Good job, man!

    Now, did I miss something or did you cut the mullet? ‘Cos I didn’t think I saw mulletage in those pics from this weekend…

  7. john h Says:

    If there had been nothing else besides ‘Try a Little Tenderness’ and i’d never heard you sing or talk or write before, you’d already be on the list of folks I’d want to meet. Great great great song, and you did it justice. Otis R is one of my music gods and you served it well.

    always a pleasure to watch you perform..i’ve seen that inner-Ivy,, and it’s a fun thing to behold!

  8. Slartibartfast Says:

    Lynnster, about a month ago, I couldn’t take it any more and had the hair cut. It was starting to get quite hot (I don’t mean good looking, I mean literally hot – I have a new respect for women who keep their hair long all the time).

    Then, a few days later, I decided to make my wife happy and shave off the soul patch. It never really worked; I tried it in every length and shape I could think of. No matter what I did, I just looked like my chin was dirty.

    Anyway, I appreciate the nice words. I have never taken compliments well, so the only response I’ve ever known is…


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